Today was just one of those days. Apparently when I got dressed for work, I put on my cranky pants. No real reason for being cranky, well not that I knew of. I just feel off today. School was delayed, so I got to sleep in 40 minutes longer, but I really didn't sleep well. Went to bed later, my left arm/shoulder hurts really bad and that wakes me up and I had a cup of coffee around 7:30 last night. Usually I can drink a whole pot and it doesn't bother me, last night...it did.
So today is the beginning of Week 6. I have 5 weeks of exercise behind me. I'm a little frustrated, I have yet to see a result of exercising 5 days a week. I know, I know, every little bit helps. When someone as large as me is trying to become a smaller version, results aren't quick to see. This weekend was a crap food weekend. I did not over indulge, I just didn't eat real great. Today I made sure I was more aware of what I was shoveling in. I have tonight's dinner left overs for tomorrow's lunch. My big meal will be at noon. Hubby will have left overs for tomorrow's dinner and Danny and I will have a sandwich. I've found that I really like eating a bigger meal at noon, then something light at dinner time. Now that Dan is home every night for dinner, I feel that I must make a real meal... In honesty, he could care less. I could make him toast and pour him a bowl of cereal and he'd be happy. So now that I have this exercise thing down, I have to work on my food, what I eat and the portions. I also have to increase my water. Rome wasn't built in a day and it took 46 years for me to reach this horrible, disgusting size, everything will mesh and it will slowly come off.
While dinner was in the oven, I walked away those pounds with Leslie. I was a loner today. My guys didn't join in. Dan's knee was bothering him, he sat on the couch with the heating pad, Danny sat on the other couch dozing on and off. At first I felt a little slighted, then irritated, then I just decided eff it, I'm exercising. I put myself into my own little bubble and pretended they weren't even in the room with me. I zoned. When I was finished, both of them told me what a great job I did and they both promised to join me tomorrow without my asking. I love that we as a family do this, but I am doing this for me. I can not depend on someone to do it with me. I am responsible for me. I could have very easily said screw it today because no one else was going to exercise, but I didn't. I can not do that.
Tomorrow is going to be a crazy Tuesday. The delay call from the school came. I know I can sleep in until 6:00. I have a doctor's appt. after work. I'm finally going to have my left arm and shoulder checked out. This has been going on far too long. For the past 2 weeks it keeps getting harder and harder to sleep. I've noticed a decrease in my strength and over the weekend pain was traveling down into my wrist and fingers. It sucks getting old, I feel like I'm falling apart.
I took a picture after walking this afternoon, not the best quality, I used Danny's iPod. I had that nice shimmery glean.... my fat was crying, red face and messy hair. And I felt great afterwards. This is the real me.
For those of you who are still following my journey, thank you. Please become a follower. Share my blog with your friends. It would be so incredibly wonderful to have a little support network out there. We can all help one another to become healthier versions of ourselves!
This is my blog, my thoughts, my words, my feelings.